Primary

Grace and Courtesy at the Start of the Year

Welcome to a new school year!  The returning children are back into their rhythm and off to a smooth start. The new children were welcomed this week and participated in the gatherings, games and activities that we do to learn everyone's name, support the tying of shoes, and figure out just how to be in a Montessori classroom, where everything in this space calls to them to engage, connect and enjoy! At the start of the year, the way that we show children how to do this is through Grace and Courtesy activities. In our morning gathering, Senora Medina, Miss Elena and I perform little skits with each other or with the older children who have been here a while. They are exaggerated and sometimes funny so they capture the children's attention but really we are showing them how to act and speak with each other in our little society that is the classroom. Grace and Courtesy is also established through modeling and clear language by the adults. 

Grace is a beautiful, unmerited gift that we receive from God to remain with Him. When we think of someone who is 'Full of Grace' our Blessed Mother comes to mind and she is a model for us in our daily interactions with the children. I have often wondered how she might have responded to the child Jesus when he sneezed or tried to get up from the table before the meal was finished, or when he wanted to rush past a group of people getting from one side of the room to the other. Surely, he needed to learn how to do things in the right way. How should we respond? Courtesy is how we extend that gift of grace to others through the refinement of our movements, our words, our tone of voice and the consideration of others.

In our children's formative years, they are absorbing the behaviors and manners modeled by the adults and children around them, and therefore Grace and Courtesy is essential to the peacefulness and respect in our classrooms, home, play yards or wherever we are. Before the age of two 1/2 children are taking everything in so we want to give them all that is true, good and beautiful. Between the ages of 2 1/2 and 6 years they are refining these actions by practicing their tone of voice, their language, how to treat others in social situations and what is acceptable and what is not. This is why we take extra care in what we expose them to!

In our classroom we establish a culture of respect towards others through attention to virtue and the details of daily life. When the teachers are attentive to their own words, tone of voice and movements, the children respond in the same ways. When I give my full attention to a child in a presentation using a material and cleaning up; then the children do this too! When I make sure the classroom is tidy and beautiful or notice when a child is hurt or sad, the children notice and do this too. They are watching everything we do and repeating everything we say. So, don't be surprised when your child is busy playing and you ask him/her something... You might hear them say to you, "I'm not available right now, but as soon as I am finished with this I will give you my full attention."  

Children are just beginning to learn how to interact with others and we want to show them what to do in different situations. Some Grace and Courtesy that we have been working on: How to say, "excuse me" when you want to pass by someone; How to put your sneeze inside your elbow; How to wait for a teachers attention if she is already with someone else; How to put a heart on your table to let a teacher know you need help with something; How to walk around a mat that is on the floor, so we don't step on someone else's materials; how to open and close a door quietly; how to knock and wait at the bathroom door; how to wait to have snack when someone else is at the table; how to walk on by a friend who is working (even if you want to stop and chat with them!).

Observation

Montessori classrooms rely heavily on the art of observation.  You may see it in action some time, or you may have an opportunity to try it yourself (which we welcome and encourage!).  If you ever walk past a classroom and see the children working intently, while the guide is quietly sitting in a corner with a clipboard, know that guide is working intently as well.  

Why we do it

Dr. Maria Montessori was a scientist and a physician.  Her education and background helped her look at the world in a way that is different from most traditional educators.  Observation of children was what inspired her work in education, and she used it to develop her methods. Not only that, but Montessori guides all over the world rely on observation to learn about their students, gain insight about developmental phases, inform our decision-making, and to assess the children’s mastery of skills.  So what are the main goals of observation in the classroom?

  • Planning appropriate lessons - Montessori educators are trained to have extensive knowledge about child development.  While most traditional teacher education programs require students to take a course on the topic, development is essentially the foundation of everything we do as Montessori guides.  Practiced guides know so much about the behaviors of growing children that seemingly insignificant occurrences signal a transition into a new plane of development. The toddler that has mastered toileting and can be observed spending long amounts of time with practical life activities is making the transition necessary for the primary classroom.  A child nearing six that has lost a tooth and seems suddenly very motivated by social interactions with their peers is moving into the second plane of development and will respond well to lessons involving storytelling and deeper information about cultures around the world. The challenge of the guide is to identify the moment when a child is entering a sensitive period; this is their development showing they are ready to learn specific skills that must be taught in a way that honors their growth.  

  • Making sure the environment serves the children - While the guide’s role in a child’s education is important, the environment plays an even bigger role.  It is the guide’s job to make sure the classroom environment allows children to find what they need, feel inspired to work, fosters independence, and allows for safety and comfort.  If, during an observation, it is noted that a piece of furniture disrupts the flow of movement, it will be moved at a later time. If many children prefer to work on the floor, it will be important to note whether there are enough work rugs for them all to use.  If no children have used a specific material in a number of weeks, it may need to be reintroduced or removed from the shelf. Each item in the classroom must be placed intentionally and with a specific purpose in mind. If it is no longer serving its intended purpose, reflection and a solution are required.

  • Assessment of skills - The word assess is derived from the Latin form to sit beside.  Montessori schools do not determine mastery with the use of tests, but rather by utilizing observation.  Instead of giving children a piece of paper with questions on it, we watch them in action. When a child is able to independently place number tiles in random order on a hundred board, we know they have grasped the concept of ordering those numbers.  A child who is able to complete complex patterns within the shape they traced using a metal inset, and who also frequently uses the sandpaper letters correctly is likely ready to learn the written formation of letters using a pencil on a piece of paper.  This assessment, of course, ties back into planning appropriate lessons, as the guide has concrete information to inform their instruction.

What it looks like

  • Formal observations - A Montessori guide will likely observe in the classroom most days, or multiple guides may take turns observing.  These observations typically last between fifteen and thirty minutes, but the amount of time can vary. While each guide has their own preferred method, they typically sit quietly and use a notebook to record what they observe.  Children are taught about the importance of this work and they know not to disturb the adult at this time. Sometimes a guide will sit in a specific chair or use a special clipboard to signal to the children that they are working.  For new guides, the temptation to intervene can be powerful, but we learn that unless a child is in danger it’s often best to wait it out and see what happens. Most classrooms have a second adult that is able to redirect a child who may be overly disruptive, allowing the observing adult to continue.  During this time the guide simply watches and takes lots of notes. It is important that the notes be strictly observational and that any judgement or inferencing be reserved for another time.

  • Informal observations - During the course of the work period, guides will make a great many observations in the moment.  While walking across the room to retrieve something, while speaking to a child, or even whilst in the middle of a lesson, there are many helpful bits of information a guide can gather and record that will help make the children’s educational experience the best it can be.  As you may imagine, this results in many, many notebooks full of amazing and adorable anecdotes. 

Visitor observation

Whether you are considering Montessori for your child, they are in a program but getting ready to move to a new level, or if you’re just curious and want to learn more about the philosophy, observation is one of the greatest tools available to you.  Even the most experienced guides make time to visit other Montessori schools when possible so that they may observe other classrooms and gather fresh ideas and inspiration. We invite you to contact us should you be interested in giving it a try.

When you enter a Montessori classroom to observe, it is very important to know that the children will be engaged in their work and the goal is to watch without disturbing them.  In many other scenarios in life, we announce ourselves upon entering a room, perhaps even greeting others enthusiastically. When observing in the classroom, we ask that visitors refrain from doing these things, tempting as it may be!  You will likely be greeted by an adult or child and directed to a chair. Having a notebook or clipboard is helpful, as you are sure to experience moments you will want to record. If a child approaches you and greets you, by all means please feel free to briefly greet them in return.  In general, however, you will need to sit quietly and observe in a way that the children forget you are there, leaving them free to focus on their work. Montessori children are quite used to visitors, so this shouldn’t be a problem.

Some questions that will help guide your observation include:

  • In what ways are the children displaying independence?

  • How do the children choose their work?

  • What do transitions between work look like?

  • How do the adults respond to the children?

  • How do the children respond to the adults?

  • How do the children interact with one another?

  • How do the children care for their own basic needs?

  • Does anything about the classroom environment surprise you?

When your observation is complete, it is best to slip out of the classroom quietly.  In this situation you are not expected to say any formal goodbyes.

You can do this at home!

While home is very different from the classroom, there are ways that parents can apply the basic concepts of Montessori observation.  While trying to engage with our children, it can be easy to fall into patterns in which we begin directing their play. Every once in a while, sit back and watch as your child plays.  You may notice them using their toys in surprising ways, and this may give you insight to their interests and maturity. Similarly, it can be tempting to jump in and help any time your child spills something, falls down, or struggles to do something.  Instead of rushing to the rescue, wait. If they ask for help, of course, lend a hand, but oftentimes they will want to address the situation themselves. Watching to see what our children are capable of and nurturing their independence is one of the greatest gifts you can give them.  

As you pay attention and observe your child’s play, eating habits, sleeping habits, and social habits, you may learn many new things about their development.  This, in turn, will allow you to reflect on how you might best support them on their journey through childhood. Slow down, observe, and enjoy those moments.

The “Should Be” Trap

The spontaneous urge towards development, which is within the child, dictates its own pace.”
-Maria Montessori

The beginning of the year in the Children's House unfolds in a way that resembles the unfolding of development. Our first days are spent just enjoying one another, getting to know each other, and getting to know the environment around us. We play games, sing songs, and simply learn how to be in our space. We spend a lot of time out in nature and participate in lots of practical life! It is through practical life that the children connect with and take ownership of their environment and themselves. The tears that we see in those early days comes from a grief within a child who is just wondering, "Where can my love go? Can I give it to these adults? Can I give it to these friends? Can I give it to this space?"

Now we have been together for several weeks, and little by little, the children are coming to know me and I am getting to know them. The youngest children have had enough presentations to get them through the morning, with a few songs, games, and stories mixed in. The older children who now have a long repertoire of activities to choose from, are helping the younger children with cleaning up spills, folding the clean laundry of washcloths, setting up for lunch, and the many other ways to care for our beautiful space that they have learned over the years.

This is one of those little pockets of time where a directress can observe the environment and see many beautiful examples of self-mastery, but in those in between moments, begin to think things like, "This child wrote and illustrated a sentence in the first week of school, he should be writing sentences each day. . .This child should be walking in our classroom. . . This child should be choosing the materials that I presented to him yesterday. . .This child should not be wrestling on the floor with his favorite buddy. . .

It's just our human nature to show a child how to do something or to give them an instruction knowing that they are capable of doing it. But then they don't; and our immediate response is often, "they should be . . ." But when I hear the word should in my mind, I shift my perspective. What does this child need? I gave him the presentation, but now he's not choosing it? Why? Living with children in a Montessori way, requires us to ask ourselves hard questions, like "What does this child still need me to do? Am I giving them a safe place to put their love?" I love a method of being with children where the adults need to look at themselves and notice, "This child needs me to sit next to him a little longer while he does his work or this child needs me to show more grace and courtesy to the community or this child needs me to back off and give more time and space after an instruction."

We are all working on self-mastery and there are glimmers of it everyday and the children are stretching themselves and improving themselves and we are all developing ourselves. This is a time to trust in the method, to trust that this environment that we prepared will give them everything we need, to trust that the children will find it, and to trust in ourselves that with patience and love that we will turn the glimmers of self-mastery into long stretches of concentration and self-mastery. It is hidden within the child, and comes when we are least expecting it.