Light One Candle for Hope

“Light one candle for hope, 

 One bright candle for hope, 

 He brings hope to every heart, 

 He comes! He comes!” 

 A blessed Advent to all, it’s a new year in the Church! This sacred season invites us to prepare our hearts and homes for the coming of Christ, the Light of the World. Together with the whole Church, the Young Children’s Community is joyfully entering into the spirit of anticipation and preparation for the feast of Our Lord’s birth. 

From the moment the children arrived, we marked the beginning of Advent with a meaningful procession, introducing them to the new liturgical season. Our prayer table was lovingly prepared to reflect the season, adorned with a purple tablecloth (symbolizing preparation), an Advent wreath with 4 candles (3 purple and 1 rose), flowers, the Holy Bible, a statue of Mary, and the First Prophecy card. 

The toddlers are captivated by the changes in their sacred space, especially the vibrant purple on the prayer table and the carefully arranged Advent wreath. This week, we lit the first purple candle, a candle of hope. The children were introduced to the idea of God’s promise to His people, a promise of a great gift that would bring light to the world. They heard how the people of God waited for this promise with faith and trust, guided by prophets who loved God deeply. These prophets prayed with their whole hearts and minds, listening to God’s whispers and sharing clues about the great gift to come. 

During our time together, the children heard the words of Isaiah’s prophecy “The people who walked in darkness have seen a Great Light.”  These words filled the room with silence and awe. After the prayer service, some children remained near the prayer table. Some were drawn to its beauty, intrigued by the candles and wreath; others explored the figures of the Holy Family and the Good Shepherd. Some picked up the Holy Bible and sat quietly. 

 As we continue our Advent journey, the Young Children’s Community will light an additional candle on the wreath each week, symbolizing the growing light as we move closer to the birth of Jesus. Together, we will hear more clues from the prophets, sing songs of the season, and hear more stories of people who prepared their hearts for God’s greatest gift.  In this time of waiting and preparation, we are reminded that we are also called to be a light for others. Let us ponder how we can share hope, peace, joy, and love as we prepare our hearts for the arrival of the Greatest Light, Jesus Christ, at Christmas.

Living Souls Museum

As I write this, I am still warmed by the energy and release of our Living Souls Day celebration.  The last two days seem a bit like a blur to me.  The same might be true for some of our students.  At recess on Tuesday afternoon, one first year boy asked me, "when do we need to tell people about our saint?"  I asked him what he meant.  "You know, when we tell them our research."  

"I think that already happened today.  You already did it."  A spark of realization hit him and then he was gone--running to play with friends.

On Monday morning this week our mantra of "today is normal" was subverted by two looming facts.  One, our classroom's first birthday of the school year was being celebrated today.  (I can't come up with an exact percentage for how rare it is that none of the 32 names on our birthday board--26 students, three elementary staff, two teacher's babies, and one Mary Pat-- had birthdays in September and October, but I can tell you that it is a bit of a statistical anomaly.)  The smell of pancakes danced in the air.  We began with a few servings of gluten free pancakes for our honored student who turned 7 over the weekend, and his little brother, who visited from Ms. May's class.  

The other thing on all our minds that morning was that this afternoon would be our full dress rehearsal for our Living Souls Museum--the culmination of weeks of research and practice.  Like anything else in Montessori elementary education, this project contained a baseline expectation (a report, a costume, a picture, and an oral report) but no ceiling.  Many older children use their report to practice their handwriting.  Others use the opportunity to practice their typing at home, coming in with a beautifully formatted report that surprises the younger students.  (One first year student saw a 6th year reading from her printed report to some guests and essentially accused her of plagiarism.  "No", she said, "I wrote this.  I wrote this on the computer."  Incredulous, he took a closer look at the neat lines of small text.  "But how?")  Other students turned fabric into 4th century Roman tunics.  Many readers just recently were working on some of these costumes together with their children at home.  Take note of the decisions that you made and the responsibility you took on this year.  Next year it will be less.  The year after that it will be less than that.  

After recess, some older students cleared the hallway of furniture, and placed out a chair for each student.  If you have never visited our Living Souls Museum, we take over the hallways of the school, lining ourselves up all the way from the elementary atrium, near Mrs. Dankoski's office, all the way around to our door closest to Mrs. Ashton's classroom. 

The students began putting on their costumes.  There was the same mix of joy and nerves I remember from theater performances with school kids.  This is something greater.  They have memorized their own words about heroes they have chosen for themselves.

Here is a list of the saints chosen:
Mary, the Mother of the God
Saint Anne
Saint Germane
Venerable Carla
Saint Hildegard von Bingen
Saint George (We had two saint Georges actually.  He is popular with boys!)
Saint John Neumann
Saint John Paul II
Archangel Gabriel
Archangel Michael
Saint Lucy
Saint George
Saint Patrick
Saint Dorothy of Caesarea
Saint John Leonardi
Saint Thomas Becket
Saint John Ogilvie
Saint Paul
Saint Eulalia
Saint Zelie Martin
Saint Therese of Lisiuex
Saint Felicity
Saint Perpetua
Saint Martin of Tours
Saint Francis of Assisi

Represented are martyrs, nuns, and priests, a pope, as well as humble laypeople and mothers.  Children chose these saints for many reasons.  A piece of art called to them, perhaps.  Sometimes it was the name.  Two picked their namesakes.  Another selected the saint for whom their baby sister was named.  Some picked a story that spoke to them: Paul's conversion spoke to one second year who had already been his evangelist namesake last year.  The friendship of Felicity and Perpetua called out to two upper elementary girls, who blended their oral report into something which was almost an audio drama.  A fifth year was drawn to so much about the story of Saint Francis--his life of poverty, his personal charisma, the stigmata which he received, and so much more.  

We had a special guest helping us work the kids and give them the practice they needed for the next day.  Paula O'Keefe has been involved in this school for much of its history.  She has been part of the Parents Guild and at times its head.  She has been part of the team that have made many Mardi Gras fundraisers happen.  I mostly know her from being the elementary room parent in 2022-2023 and 2023-2024.  Some of the best days of the past two years began as field trip ideas in her head.  As hard as this is for me to believe, her youngest daughter is a sixth year, and this is the last year she will be a parent in the elementary community.  

When I found out that she would be working the polls for the entire day on Election Day, and thus would not be able to join us at the Living Soul Museum, I knew she would have to be part of our dress rehearsal.  At the end we took a surprise group picture and gave her a Holy Bible from the elementary class.  

When the pictures were snapped we only had a few minutes to take off our costumes and prepare for dismissal.  Costumes once filled with saints were folded or balled up and placed on the chairs, ready for the morning.  After school a teacher from Ms. May's class tells me about a child who had been watching the rehearsal and told her, "they are on their way to heaven."

The next day dawns in the 50s.  By now most of the students are well adjusted to the time change and no longer feeling the languid aftereffects of the five-day All Saints break.  The students arrive promptly.  They are wide awake and ready.  

At 8:30 they start getting dressed.  A few children are putting on finishing touches.  Some swaddling clothes are prepared for Mary's beloved infant.  Likewise, Saint Anne makes a wrap for her daughter Mary, who was once an infant herself.  A first year furiously writes a few notes to himself so he can remember what to say about the saint for whom he was named.

At 8:45, a few parents begin walking around and conversing with the saints.  The saints began presenting all they learned to our visitors.  Who were our visitors?  They were parents and grandparents, parents from other classrooms, students from our primary classrooms, and even students from the RMS Atrium on the building's northwestern side.

I had a pocket full of safety pins, which were sometimes needed to secure a tunic or tighten swaddling clothes and angel wings.  Tape was sometimes needed for a shield strap or a holy card containing the text of the Saint Michael Prayer.  

Some of our visitors gave me their impressions on their way out.  Some consistent observations were that the children were confident and unafraid to speak in front of both adults and children.  The work they had put in was obvious.  Repeat visitors were amazed at the growth in reading they saw in our younger students.  

Before lunch, we prayed the litany of the saints, calling on all these saints to intercede for us and that we might be led by their example to follow Christ.

At recess a second year pointed an odd sight out to me--a North American Wheel Bug carrying a yellowjacket it had killed or paralyzed up a tree.  Normally these bugs predate upon caterpillars and beetles.  I suppose on this warm November day the wasp had let down its guard.

After silent reading, we gave ourselves a pat on the back and went back outside to finish the day with some organized games.  One group played freeze tag on the blacktop.  Another played gaga ball.  

You probably do not have very many gaga ball opinions.  After all, most of us did not play it ourselves when we were in school.  Its history is obscure, but it seems to have been invented in Israel about 75 years ago and spread from Jewish summer camps in America to schools.  Its popularity lies mainly in that kids love it.  While you may not have gaga ball opinions, I have one.  One of our 3rd year girls plays the game the right way.  She is the Shoeless Joe Jackson, Roberto Clemente, and Tony Gwynn of gaga ball.  When she is hit, she goes out immediately without complaint.  She plays with intelligence and finesse.  She doesn't spare her friends or target particular children.  She reminds people of the rules kindly.  

As the bright and warm sun shined down at an autumnal angle, she was one of the final three players in a hard fought round.  When she got out, she walked proudly to the side.  A 5th year boy leaned over and put his hand out to receive a high five.  She gave him a crisp one.

Maybe you had to be there to see it, but I felt in that moment the presence of the saints and that here in Nokesville we too are learning their lessons and, please God, are on our way to heaven.

Translating Montessori School Life to Montessori Home Life

It was so wonderful to have an opportunity to meet and connect with all of the parents last week! In fact one parent asked me if I needed a break in between conferences, I laughed and said that having conferences is a break! . In all seriousness, while I enjoy sharing my days with the children, it is nice to have 2 full days of adult conversations about these little people that we love so much!

Several parents wanted to discuss similar topics, so I thought I would address one here…  Parents are trying to serve the daily needs of families, get some projects done around the house and some are working from home. Some wonder, how it is possible for 2 (or 3) adults to meet the needs of 26 to 30 children in the classroom and foster enough independence, so the children do not need to come (to the adult) every 10 minutes for help. Also, many of you are looking for suggestions of how to support your children’s independence and live life at home without the use of screens. So, first, I want to thank you for taking the time to read our recent post about the damaging effects of screens and being interested in making changes in your family for healthier living. 

The solution stems from a foundation of structure and limits to develop not just independence, but also agency. In a Montessori environment it is essential that the boundaries and limits are established in the first weeks of school. Parents have heard us Montessori teachers yammer away about how order is a fundamental need for the First Plane child (birth to 6), but it’s not just because we like things tidy. There is a need for external order, routine, structure and limits so that the children can develop self control and inner discipline, the ability to make good choices for themselves, and learn how to live in community with others- at school and at home.

As you have read before, the first weeks set the tone for the whole year and the first thing that we do together are games and songs that establish relationship and connection. We then give each of the children lots of attention with small group activities, stories and the little skits of Grace and Courtesy. This fills their ‘emotional cup’ (so to speak) as well as continuing to strengthen the foundation of our relationship.  We also show them how to do lots of things that they love (all of the materials of the classroom).  3 year olds love activities of practical life (water and polish!), the 4 year olds love the sensorial games, the 5 year olds love the big games of golden beads… we give them something to do and then give them the time and space to do it.

Parents are well aware of what the freedom in a Montessori classroom looks like, but the structure/ discipline is not as obvious, so how to duplicate it at home can be harder. Within the word ‘discipline’ is the word, ‘disciple’. A disciple is a follower of a teacher or a leader (think, Jesus and his disciples). With that in mind, we show the children how we want to live together, and we do this through grace and courtesy lessons and modeling. All of the lessons in Grace and Courtesy identify opportunities of respect for each other, and some of the grace and courtesy lessons I give let the children know the limits and boundaries. One being, that I am not always going to be “available” to help them.  (It is OK because remember, I have already filled their cup, made connection, laid a foundation of friendship and shown them lots of things to do). As the weeks unfold, they begin to discover, I am often speaking with or helping or showing a material to someone else, I often have something in my hands, sometimes I am observing the classroom. My unavailability can sometimes be uncomfortable. However, in time, they come to know that I am always nearby, even though I am not always available. So, what then? They can ask a friend. They can explore a material or a situation until they figure it out. They can wait until I or someone else is available. They can put a heart on their table or work mat, which lets others know they need help and someone can come by to help them. Inevitably, they become problem solvers… they look for creative solutions… they figure it out or they develop patience by waiting. All of these, support independence and agency. For these little people, creating their personalities, it is about having the ability to influence their own life and the lives of others. It’s about taking responsibility, being proactive, and feeling in control of their circumstances. It develops resiliency and perseverance through challenging situations. 

So, how does this translate to home life so we can get things done whether they are personal, family responsibilities or for work? 
* Set a routine and a structure for your time at home 
* make connection and give your children your full attention (before trying to get things done)
* give them things to do and show them how to do things, then give the time and space to do them- (be OK with mistakes, frustrations, and messes)
* when you are available to do things together, get the children involved with household activities and the responsibilities of family life (like cleaning up the messes and mistakes from their time on their own)
* set boundaries and limits when you are not available and let children know that you will come to them and give them your full attention when you are finished with _______ (and then do that).

Janet Lansbury has a great podcast that she released in 2020 when parents were working from home and children were home from school and everyone was trying to balance work and family life. I have it here: https://www.janetlansbury.com/2020/08/3-hints-for-parents-working-at-home/

There are times at school when our routine is off, our limits are not enforced, human will gets in the way... But each day is fresh. Dr. Montessori said each day the children come to us as ‘new children’. So, we begin again by filling their cup, playing games, modeling what we want the children to follow, and holding the limits of respect for others to the best of our ability.